Would You Rather...

Preston North End 0 v Sheffield United 2

The Championship

Friday 9 August 2024

SUFC 2024/25 Game #5

Here we are. Back in The Championship. This time, with our rivals Sheffield Wednesday. Which brings its own dilemma and distractions. I'll let my muuuuuch younger mate Charlie take up the story.

Do you remember Charlie? He last featured in the Blog drinking Superbock in a Burger King on The Algarve when United played Estoril.

Charlie hates Sheffield Wednesday. So, tonight on the Sensible Beer Bus he was posing some - would you rather questions.

Phil. Would you rather beat Wednesday home & away, but miss out on promotion and stay in The Championship?

Or

Would you rather lose both games to ‘em, but get promoted?

Easy. Get promoted…

Charlie was dumbfounded.

No. No. No. It doesn't matter what else happens so long as we don't lose to that lot.

Charlie, that's just wrong. You cannot be saying the only thing that matters to you this season is beating Sheffield Wednesday.

Phil, yes Phil, that is exactly what I'm saying.

OK, fucking have this. Would you rather win both games against Sheffield Wednesday AND be relegated AND they get promoted

Or

Would you rather lose against them both times AND be promoted AND they get relegated.

Charlie is going to get back to me on that one!!! And so it begins…

After the Huddersfield friendly, I wrote about United completing Phase One. That's the bit of the season where your gones have gone, your ins are in, and you have to start the season for real with what you've got. Thankfully, I covered myself by saying Phase One would not really be over until Thursday Dinner. Because, we inned some inners in the week.

One of those, Alfie Gilchrist started (right back) and Harry Soutar was an unused Sub. From minus two points before a ball was kicked, that win was a good bit of ball kicking by The Blades.

A definite game plan. Lots of attacking intent. Possession with purpose, rather than for its own sake. The Carrier Bag Firm enjoyed it so much, we were even discussing flexibilities.

At some point, they will have to use Rhian in that wideish left, come on your right foot role currently occupied by Hamer. But, Rhian could also have a shot at the deeper of two attackers, running with the ball at his feet, with players peeling off into channels role. Currently occupied by Callum O’Hare.

Indeed, they made that happen a bit later on by pushing Callum a bit deeper and righter to make way.

Here's glass half empty.

Fuck Sake they were going to take ‘dre Brooks off and put Slimane out right. Hamer’s gone down with Beattie Cramp. So Slimane is now going wide left. No depth. Not enough players. Square pegs.

Here's glass half full

Brilliant, they've already shown Slimane the Pie Charts and Clipboard and iPad stuff to bring him on wide right. Hamer's struggling, so Slimane will have to, flexibly, go wide left instead.

What Phil? Even though they've shown him the wide right charts?

Yes mate, they'll just say - Anis, you know those wide right instructions, just turn ‘em upside down, and inside out … in your mind

On a couple of occasions in the first half, we got caught out a bit at the back. In a two, rather than a three, Robbo and Anel were a little too far apart, too much space between them and balls into the penalty spot caused a few problems. That just needs drilling and shoring up.

Brooks looked a little more dynamic coming in diagonally off the right, at pace, with the ball at his feet. But he needs to pull the trigger better, but mainly harder.

The second goal comes from keeper Woodman throwing it straight to Hamer. Woodman has that ball in the first place following a Brooks cut inside and weak shot. As the players celebrated Hamer's lob, I noticed a few of them singled Brooks out. Not for “the assist”. But, to encourage and cajole him for what had been a GREAT run, rather than a POOR finish. Love that.

I am afraid, again, we need to turn to The Organiser’s timekeeping. He had, inexplicably, called the departure from the bar in Bamber Bridge for Six O’Clock. For the very short trip to Deepdale for the Eight O’Clock kick off.

I was sat outside;

Beer Box

Unit 3, 143 Station Rd, Bamber Bridge, Preston PR5 6LA

The Organiser came scuttling across the Pelican.

Six fifteen now, six fifteen.

Well. Fifteen minutes extra drinking is extra drinking. So I gave him the Carrier Bag Firm seal of approval chant.

Four more years. Four more years.

Although I should point out he is a benign, autocratic, unelected dictator anyway. So there'll be no election. Did he put the fifteen minutes extra board up to help us plough into more Hazy Pales? The truth is - not really.

The truth lies in the mismatch between The Organiser's sublime must look after his customers obsession and the fucking extraordinarily mental way he behaves.

It turns out. The pub which “The Fooders” went in didn't open the kitchen until half four. And they hadn't been expecting such an immediate influx and orders on the dot. So, the kitchen was backed up, and The Fooders were getting more and more worried that their nutrients wouldn't materialise in time for the 6pm exodus.

I hear tell that The Organiser was scurrying around the pub, giving the staff the hurry up, and the “explanatory pep talk”. Even grabbing plates of food off the counter and heading out into his peoples.

Cheeseburger and Chips and some Italian thing with salad. Whose is this?

Steve. Have you finished with those plates. I need to take them back to the kitchen.

I mean, who does that? The Organiser. That's who. The Organiser channeling his Gordon Ramsay Kitchen Nightmares spirit.

I didn't experience that first hand because I was with The Drinkers, not The Fooders. There were four on Cask. But only two pukka Keg.

Nightjar Brew Co. (Mytholmroyd, West Yorkshire), Hermit Crab Of Hope, Pale Ale on Keg at 4%

Opaque, gelato frothy, and inviting. Zingy at first, but then softened out. Lots of Hops. Simcoe & Ekuanot in the boil and the fermenters.

Wily Fox Brewery (Wigan), Nelson Pale on Cask at 3.9%

Excellent that. NZ hopped pale. Very well balanced.

MBH Beer (Knutsford, Cheshire), Limoncello Pale on Keg at 4.8%

Claims to be brewed with fresh Amalfi and Sorrento lemons. Yeah. One of each maybe. I'm making the point - nice beer, but not as lemony as advertised. That one squeezed in because someone else's ham & cheese toastie hadn't arrived FFS.

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