United 1 Stouts 8

We've beat "the authorities"

Sheffield United 1 v Sheffield Wednesday 0

The Championship

Sunday 10 November 2024

SUFC 2024/25 Game #29

Rhetorical Question. If you can't act up at a Derby Game, when can you act up?

Look. Got to face this head on. There is nothing, we saying nothing, that gets me as riled as any suggestion from “the authorities” that pubs/bars may not be permitted to open for certain games. Or may have their opening times limited. Or may permit Home Fans Only, or Away Fans Only. When I am the fucking opposite type of Fan.

If “the authorities” say - you can't do it. I'm fucking doing it. You know where I live. Come and get me.

And, natch, there were all sorts of rumours circulating about where you would, and wouldn't, be able to Avail Ale on Derby Day, and when.

So. Here's an open message to “the authorities”. It's all fucking changed. And you need to keep up. Take Random Pub A. When it came to it last time they had to renew, they thought - let's face it, we're never going to open at 0900 on a Sunday. Let's put in for 1100. So, on Derby Sunday, they have to ask “the authorities” for Special Permission to open at nine. And, it's easy for “the authorities” to fuck ‘em off. They've even had a stamp made - REQUEST REFUSED.

But, it's all changed. You've got your shop front micropubs. You've got your microbreweries. You've got your Bottle Shops. You've got your new hospitality developments. You've got your food halls and your courtyards.

You've got your push ahead businesses. Who sell beer over the internet, nationwide. Who sell beer to footfall passers by, so they can take beer home for their fridges. Who organise cheese and beer tasting events, street festivals, meet the brewers, etc.

It's no longer about Random Pub A. The smaller, diversified businesses can't live with 1100am licenses. They need 0800am licenses. They need Tasting Room Licenses. Those are the fuckers you need to visit on Derby Sunday.

To be honest, it's too easy nowadays for the Carrier Bag Firm. When “the authorities” try to fuck around with openings and closings, there's bundles of places to pick where you can put two fingers up to them.

Craft & Berry

369 Ecclesall Rd, Sharrow, Sheffield S11 8PF

In addition, we had hatched a plan. A plan we might usefully call - The Stout City Derby.

Tartarus Beers (Leeds), Collab with State Of Mind Brew Co (Wigan), Saint Nick, Stout from a Tin at 6%. Thick. Luxurious. Difficult to taste past the booze. Goes a bit Rum. Sweet on the tongue. Leading onto some nice bitter in the finish.

Brew York, Fairytale Of Brew York 2024, Milk Stout from a Tin at 4.9%. Slightly spoiled by the earlier one. This tastes much thinner. There is a bit of sourness (cherry I'm reading). Quite easy drinking in a way.

New Bristol Brewery, Cinder Toffee Stout from a Tin at 4%. Recipe includes Blow Torched Honeycomb. FFS. Let's deal with this. That smells gorgeous. Sucks you in. Crunchie. That's what I'm saying. Crunchie. Unfortunately, that doesn't survive into the first mouthful. But, fair play, the burnt cinder does get there. Becomes "beery" as you get down it.

Triple Point Brewing (Shoreham Street), Luxe // Salted Caramel, Imperial Porter on Keg at 7.6%. Brewed using cacao nibs from Bullion Craft Chocolate in Sheffield. Salted Caramel, Ecuadorian Cacao nibs and Madagascan vanilla. Admiral Hops.

And. Then a football game broke out. Easy to pitch that as a - where United are - game. Solid and committed all over the pitch. But putting who they can up top in the lone striker role. And whoever that is doing their best. But, in general, not much threat from that. Relying on the widers and the creatives and the set pieces. Solid. And see what you can get.

At half time. At nil nil. I had moved into - fuck me put two up top for its own sake - mode. Or at least have one of the others move into a proper make something happen number Ten. I know he's had a chance. And I know he's not up to it yet. And I'm not saying find a place for him. But that's crying out for a Louie Marsh. One day…

And, just as I was formulating my arguments. Campbell does a striker thing. A few anxious moments. But we were home from there.

Which brings us to the celebration.

Turner's Craft Beer Bottle Shop

298 Abbeydale Rd, Nether Edge, Sheffield S7 1FL

Turner's were part of the Siren Craft Brew (Wokingham) Caribbean Chocolate Cake 2024 launch. Hence the general Stout Theme of the day. Recap. Every year in November, Siren release four Caribbean Chocolate Cake stouts. Many readers will be familiar with wood, barrel, oak, etc flavours in beer. Usually achieved by putting the beer in something wood (a barrel).

Siren have done the science. And they reckon better flavours come from putting the wood in the beer (rather than putting the beer in wood). So they put spirals of Cypress wood into the pot when they boil up the beer.

Unfortunately, there was no beer venue near Sheffield doing Keg versions. But we were able to Tin Up In Turner's.

Siren Craft Brew, Collab with Vault City Brewing (Edinburgh), Caribbean Chocolate Cake: Rocky Road Brownie, Imperial Milk Stout from a Tin at 7.8%. I have to confess, dear reader, that I doubt I'd be able to pick a Rocky Road Brownie out of a Cake Shop identity parade anyway. Thick. Luscious. Can't say I'm getting honeycomb. Lot of chocolate mind.

Siren Craft Brew, Caribbean Chocolate Cake: Chocolate Orange Tiramisu, WHITE STOUT from a Tin at 8.4%. That caught me out a bit. I didn't realise it was a White Stout until I poured it. I sometimes feel White Stouts are just some fucker showing off. Last bastion of a scoundrel. Natch, tastes lush. Orange all over it.

Siren Craft Brew, Caribbean Chocolate Cake 2024, Imperial Milk Stout from a Tin at 7.4%. The “standard one”. Your cacao nibs and your wood spirals. Banging. Lots of chocolate. But some bitterness comes later. Thick. Rich. Luxurious.

Siren Craft Brew, Death By C.C.C. Imperial Milk Stout from a Tin at 12.2%. The “souped up one”. Night Night.

That wasn't everyone's Derby Day. But it was mine.

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This season, I hope to go to a different pub/bar for each home game I attend.

Wrexham = Ale Club. QPR = Craft & Berry, Watford = International Bar, Derby = Bath Hotel. Swansea = Two & Six Micropub. Luton = Beer House. Stoke = Hop Hideout. Wednesday = Turner's Craft Beer Bottle Shop.

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