John Egan FCOptom, Optician

Queens Park Rangers 1 v Sheffield United 1

The Championship

Monday 2 January 2023

SUFC 2022/23 Game #39

I watch a lot of live sport. But my eyesight is not particularly good. So, over the years, I've had to deploy a number of optical correction devices to get the full enjoyment. I've had contact lenses since the mid 1980s. One of the opticians I had was brilliant. Didn't bat a lid of his own eye when I told him;

"I need to see exactly what is happening at the batting crease from the back row of the Melbourne Cricket Ground."

The Contact Lens Compromise was that I'd be pin sharp at 200 yards, but struggling with anything close up. Eventually, I had to give that up once I started to need reading glasses to eat my tea!!!

So, I've started wearing glasses at football & cricket. A lovely pair of half rimmed Oakley's. I am an absolute OAKLEY WHORE. I could not imagine wearing bins made by another company. Anyway, love those Oakley's. Except. They've got those reactive lenses that turn into sunglasses. Great for cricket in the Summer. Indeed, great for Loftus Road in January. That is until you get in the pub, and they've still got a bit of reactive going on. And, you're in the pub, on a cold, dark, January night. Wearing fucking sunglasses. And, frankly, looking like a cock.

So, I have another pair with normal lenses for wearing when it's dark. What? Yes mate, of course they're fucking Oakley's. (Rimless). If I'm honest, those have never felt quite right. Certainly not as snug as the others. A bit tight on the schnoz.

But. I have news. I've had that second pair adjusted and refitted and they're now much better.

"Sounds great Phil, you need to be able to see comfortably. Who did 'em for you?"

"John Fucking Egan"

At games, I'm a stay till the ender. But, I shuffle towards the exit with maybe a minute to go and watch from the top of the stairs or whatever. I was particularly keen for a quick getaway from QPR. What with the tight gangways and stairs and the need to get served sharpish in the Crown & Sceptre.

I was caught in the wrong place at the wrong time as Eeeeegs equalised on 90+6. As the away end limbed, I took three good whacks in the face. That goal made the first pint in the Crown & Sceptre all the bitterer (sweeter beer just doesn't work for me). But, as I composed myself, I realised my glasses were nice and comfortable (for once). I inspected closely, to see that one (or more) of the Fizzog Whacks had bent the nose bridge thingy into the right shape.

I thought QPR did a bit of a number on us. They played well. And, it would have been fair if they'd won it. Quick to close us down and deny us space. Very lively on their own throw ins, constant movement. And, got us sussed at our throw ins, where we seemed static. That's why I thought getting Robinson on was a good idea. His long throws giving us more options. Still, we are where are. We're great at doing what we do. But, a little unsure about Plans B onwards.

If Ndiaye and Berge aren't particularly firing, and they weren't tonight, then there's too much reliance on Norwood's cross fielders to try and get something going out wide. And, with a deliberate hint of criticism, Sharp has got to put more of those half chances away.

I thought we could have tried to play it between the lines a bit more. And the centre three, particularly Anel, could have stepped through the line more.

I've seen a few So Meed types bigging up Dan Jebbison's cameo. Fair enough. But, when the ball is crossed, he waits for it. He doesn't get on the shoulder of the defender, he doesn't monster him, it's too easy for the defender to head clear.

Anyway. Fuck all that. 90+6 swinging leg, glasses refitted, let's hit the Crown & Sceptre. I'm afraid I found the Keg beers a bit flat and life lacking. Maybe someone hadn't checked, or switched on, the right bit of kit.

Meantime Brewing Co, Donut Dunk, Dark Lager on Keg at 4.5%

Dark Star Brewing Co Collab with Little Monster Brewing Co (both West Sussex), Red Giant, Red IPA on Cask at 5%

The Hypochondria

My name is Phil, I'm a Type II Diabetic. I have had no unnecessary choccies, biccies, sweeties or ice cream since my last Blog.

I average SIX units of alcohol per week over the past 7 days, in the week, that did climb briefly over my target of 14.

More encouragingly, my 30 day average units of alcohol is EIGHT per week.

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