Come See My Fine Cakes

Yorkshire 254 all out

v Durham 42 for 2

close of play Day One

County Championship Division Two

Thursday 11 May 2023

Played at Chester-le-Street

Welcoming as always at The Riverside. Three blokes at the far end of the Geoff Cook Suite (Members lounge) were into their third bottle of white wine when I went for a piss just before Lunch. Later on in the day, I noticed Andy Dawson mooching across the suite. He's summat. Yorkshire Cricket Commercial Director, Chief Operating Operator, you know, one of them things. I hope as he walked through the busy, boozy, boisterous suite, he was pondering;

"Why isn't the fucking Headingley Long Room like this?"

Simple things Bruv, simple things. The cakes, biscuits, scones, muffins were arranged on a central, come look at my fine wares, table. See me, buy me, eat me. And remember, this Blog is primarily not about cake!!!

Meanwhile, at Headingley…

"Have you got any cake?"

"I don't know, I'll just go and ask…"

Any way that's enough fucking cake. There were numerous signs around the gaff explaining that the two guest beers on the sticks were both from Yorkshire. Ossett Yorkshire Blonde and Timothy Taylor's Boltmaker. With tasting notes. Now, that's a free hit, good way, of making people welcome. I bet that white wine was crisp and chilled to perfection an' all.

The night before team talk had been in;

The Town Mouse

11 St Mary's Pl, Newcastle upon Tyne NE1 7PG

Great place. As we lolloped down the street trying to find it, knowing it was a basement bar, the realisation dawned.

"It's under that fucking Wetherspoons."

As we walked in, the conversation at the bar was about the Tafjord rockslide disaster in Norway (1934). When a landslip (rather than an earthquake) created a 62 metre high tsunami which killed 34 people living near the fjord shore. My sort of obscure knowledge bar this.

Six on Cask, eight pukka craft Keg. The Barman came over to explain one of the beers listed on the printed menu had gone and detailed the replacement. That's how to run a bar for the Carrier Bag Firm Tickers.

Two By Two Brewing (Wallsend), Sabro Idaho Loral Pale on Keg at 4.9%

It was a little difficult to pick the individual flavours out of that one. It all felt a bit of a stew. The smell was tropical. But that didn't survive into the taste. Salad leaf, nettle bitterness, but gentle and growing.

Flash House Brewing Co (North Shields) Collab with the bar, What IPAs You Got, IPA on Keg at 6.5%

That tasted a bit thin at first, particularly at that abv. But, it was a grower. I got a bit of caramel, which came from nowhere. As you get well down it, the bitterness grows nicely.

Brass Castle Brewery (Malton), Beware Soothsayers, West Coast IPA on Cask at 5.6%

That tasted booming and rich and luxurious first up. In yer face. But, it died thin a bit as you got deep into the innings. A lot to love with good underpinning pine bitterness.

Yonder Brewing (Somerset), Coconut Double Berry Ripple, Ice Cream Sour on Keg at 6%

Well. You know. As described. It was one of them - man alive, wake up - beers as you first sipped it. The initial tart lost quickly to the coconut. Which dominated. But then settling into ice cream. Once you get over the initial shock, that all worked very well.

No batter ever looked settled. Maybe the ropes were a long way back. Maybe the grass a little long. But even well timed shots seemed to pull up in the field and a lot of running was needed. By both Batters and Fielders. Matthew Potts looked lively. Hooping it around. Hit Masood and Shakeel on the lids.

In the main, the Yorkshire lads dug in and weathered a few storms. But nobody could cash in. Masood top scored with just 44. Yorkshire lost three wickets on 202 to be reeling at 202 for eight. The earlier dig in phase had been fucked off in favour of slapping short balls, that hadn't quite got up, straight to fielders.

A bit of late humpty. And the two openers, including Lees, gone cheaply, helped Yorkshire out.

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